Threads Of Your Life

Mindful Moment – Threads of Your Life

 

Rarely is life a single thread that is easily followed from where you are to your own private destination. But that is why you are here, isn’t it? To learn and enjoy the journey. Your life and the thread in your hand may start out straight and untangled, but rarely does it stay that way for very long. It quickly becomes tangled and knotted, twisting and turning upon itself as you navigate the distractions and delusions of your path.

You may find yourself rushing along a straight path, only to see that where you are standing lies in the middle of confusion. It only takes a short while before someone’s comment leads you in the wrong direction, chasing after money or fame or that corner office you so covet until you get there. That is the point when you step back to see the threads you once followed without question no longer make sense and land you in a place with no apparent ends in sight.

There are no exits. Even when looking from above all you see is a big mess, a tangle of confusion. You pull on one end and it simply tightens the knot. You pull on another to find it leads nowhere.

The easiest way to get out is to stop trying to get out. Rather than fight the knot, simply loosen it. Work to loosen the threads until the knot is gone. You will soon find that the threads you once fought with are not as important as they once were. That is when it will make more sense to snip the line than to continue untangling the string that is left. You will realize that it was only a five dollar ball of yarn and not really worth your time to untangle the entire ball. It makes far more sense to simply snip the line.

There will be other tangles, so before you become frustrated, find a single thread and follow it. Know that it will not lead to the way out, but it will help you reduce the size of the knot in front of you. Do as much as you can and then let it go.

Change your expectation, and see each thread as a path, not the end. With a different course of action that you can jump from at any point in time, life becomes much easier to handle. Yes the knot may be unapproachable, your initial goal may seem unattainable, but if you revise your strategy and realize the original goal may no longer be relevant it all becomes very simple.

Take a single thread and straighten it out as best you can. When you have reached the end of that thread, wind it into a neat loop. Set it aside with the intention of coming back to it later. Do the same for another thread and make a new loop. Set each loop in its own place and return to the main knot. As you begin to have more loops, the size of your tangle is reduced.

At some point you will see that the strings leading to your loops become longer and longer. The tangle may not straighten itself out, but you will realize you no longer need to get rid of the know. The strings of your new loops are long enough to fit your needs without having to undo the whole knot itself.

That is the point you can snip the string and use it for whatever your project requires without having to untie the entire knotted area.

Keep doing this until you have enough strings to neatly wind them around a bobbin. Did you really need all 100 yards of string? Probably not. That was just your ego telling you it’s either you or the string. Forget about that voice. It is not worth your time or energy to the entire mess when the ten new strings will be more than enough.

Now, place those somewhere safe and throw the knot away.

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Truth & Triggers

No matter how “Zen” you may feel when you are in that flow, we all find ourselves thrown out of balance when the wrong person makes the wrong comment at just the wrong time. It almost seems as if they know just what to say at just the right to set you off.

Don’t worry, that is how they deal with the world. They live their life setting everyone around them spinning so they can remain the calm at the center of the storm. It is how they deal with the world around them. It is almost a narcissistic personality disorder, except for the fact that is has less to do with narcissism as it has to do with the only way they can feel secure is if everyone around them is spinning.

I wrote about it in my book The Simple Truth. I call it a loophole in the societal courtesies the rest of us live by. Their comment usually lies just below the response level where you feel justified in making a retort. It is not something so large that you can respond without looking like an egotistical ass. It flies just below the social radar of most people, but still it stings.

It is not like they out and out called you a name, but it was a dig. It is a trigger that they know they flicked, you know they flicked, and you have a pretty good idea everyone around you knows he or she flicked, but it was not so bad that you feel it demands a response without sinking down to their level.

It is okay, we have all been in that position. Just a few thoughts on how to handle these kinds of situations. First, let it go. Remind yourself to never allow yourself to be so caught up in the physical world that you get hurt by the actions of another or feel as if you must respond to them. A simple smirk and a rise of the eyebrow is usually enough of a response to dismiss them. You may even shake your head at the assininity of the situation, and if that is not a real word, it is about as close as I can get to calling it a passive/aggressive disorder without actually doing so [Spell check tells me it is not, but I say it should be].

You should also go one step further. Make a note of the trigger they flicked and store it for later. Once you cool down, take a moment to recognize that trigger. Admit to it and own it. Adopt it as a sensitive part of who you are. Smile at it, because it is a part of you. It is not a weakness, but a strength.

Sit down with yourself, meditate without allowing your mind to settle on the trigger that upset you like it did. Once your temperature has returned to normal, take a moment to contemplate what just happened. Replay the situation and turn it in your hands. Look at it from different angles and different perspectives. Then assess that trigger of yours. Ask yourself these three Socratic questions:

  • The first question is, has anyone said this before? If so, then this may lead to some self introspection. Is there some hint of truth to what they said, or is this the first time anyone has ever said something like this about you? If it has been said or hinted at before, then perhaps the reason it chafed so deeply is because there was a touch of truth to what they said. Do not question yourself or spend too much time pondering, but it may be worth some introspection, without getting too lost in their comments.
  • The second question is, why did they say that? Ask yourself why they said what they said. IF they did it out of anger, jealousy, or an attempt to raise themselves above you, then there is a good chance you can dismiss it. If however there was a twinge of truth to what they said, perhaps there is a lesson you can learn hidden beneath their acerbic attitude. If that is the case then perhaps you have a hint toward an attitude you yourself may take at times. Real or not, you may have been given an opportunity to change it. I call this a chance to learn from even the worst of situations.
  • The final question is, what is the nature behind what they said? Did they say whatever it was because they wanted to impress their friends or make your colleagues question your authority or confidence? Or did they say whatever it was because they saw a weakness in your personality? Either way, it again may hint at an area for improvement. If not, then it may be okay to dismiss their comment without further contemplation or thought.

Allow yourself, without allowing their comment to overwhelm you, to use their comment to explore your trigger. Ask yourself “why did that touch a nerve so deeply that I felt I had to respond?”

Try not to look at this event as an event to be angry about. Use it as an opportunity for self-growth. Look at this as an opportunity that should be met with gratitude. Each is a door to explore areas within you that may make you feel uncomfortable exploring. That is the quickest way to uncover your Simple Truth so that you may move on to living your life, on your terms, free from pain and free from delusions.

If you ever want to ask about a personal issue, please feel free to ask below. Your question will be sent directly to Jeff Cannon and held in the highest confidence.

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Be well and I hope this helps.

 

 

 

Live Life Richly, Deeply, 100%

Deep meditation is a wonderful way to remove the stress, anger, negative thoughts, and distractions that can so easily undermine our lives. We all know by now that meditation is a way to calm ourselves so that we, you, can turn dreams into ideas and ideas into actions, free from the delusions that all too often undermine the higher purpose to which we are trying to arrive.

But who ever said that is what the human experience is really all about? Having an issue to resolve is rewarding at times. It can give us meaning and a sense of fulfillment. We have all followed the fast rising celebrity who, at the height of having it “all”, suddenly lost track of what makes life worth living and tumbled a long, slow path back to humanity.

Perhaps that was their lesson to learn in the human experience we are all here to live through.

I recently told a student of mine, do not create issues that do not exist just so that you can solve them. There are more than enough issues out there for you. Just open your eyes and look ahead. They are out there, in all their miserable glory. Take the time to contemplate those issues as you develop a resolution based on your observations.

If you jump to a solution too quickly, you may end up resolving the delusions you created, not the underlying issue at the root of the problem. In time the core issue will resurface and you will be left to once again scratch your head, wondering how similar your current issue is to the one you had a week, a month, or a year ago as you once again jump to resolve the problem that seems to surface again and again and again. Each time failing to look any deeper than is needed.

When a thought interrupts your meditation, do not simply ignore it or let it go. Take a breath, take a moment to examine it. Hold it in your hands and contemplate it as you turn, to see it from a different perspective. Ask yourself if it is a thought that is worth further examination, or one you should simply release back into the ether.

Use this same approach for all the issues you stumble upon in the “real world”. Do not jump to a solution too quickly. Take the time to examine the issue. Take time to explore whatever obstacle lies in front of you. Take a breath to look at it from a new perspective. Some obstacles you think are there may not even be relevant, they are things you can avoid by simply side stepping, adjusting your direction, until you have passed it.

Do you really have to bump into that person walking toward you on the sidewalk, or can you simply drop your shoulder to avoid them altogether? Do you really have to wait for that car to drift into your lane? Or can you be fully present when you slow down to avoid them with little or no interruption in your journey. In some instances you may need to stop or step off your path, but is that really all that bad? Considering all the regret in your life from blundering forward, will that really make a difference to your future?

There are many ways to avoid an issue or an obstacle without confronting it. Simply give yourself enough time to plan an appropriate response and you will be surprised by how many seemingly insurmountable issues fade away before you even arrive at them. Take a meditative approach to your life, so that you can live your life without changing your life. Simply bend with the winds and currents of life, rather than obstinately standing up to them. Trust me, no matter how tough or strong you are, no matter how cunning you think you are, life will eventually throw a wave or a wind in your path that will knock you down, as long as you look ahead to see it coming.

I know many meditation “masters” say to be present, to remain in the here and now if you want to be happy. But who said happiness is all that life is about? There is something far better in looking ahead to make sure your path is a safe one. You do not have to live an either/or existence. Perhaps you can spend 80% of your time in the here and now while spending the other 20% looking just far enough ahead so to see the obstacles that may block your path in the future. Perhaps you need to take a break and be 100% present, know that tomorrow or next week you can look up to make sure your path is clear, or if there is even a path at all to continue on.

This is the difference between living a meditative life in the here and now, in the 21st Century world we all live in rather than the world of 2,500 years ago when meditation as we know it came to be. If happiness was the goal of life, rather than learning the lessons you were meant to live, then the Buddha would have never ventured outside the walls of his father’s compound.

Being aware is more important than being happy, if you want your life to unfold as it was meant to be.

I know it is not always easy, but for better or worse, that is not what this life is about. It is about awakening, enlightenment, and learning the lesson you are here to learn.

I hope this helps.

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Activate Your Meditation

Deep meditation is a wonderful way to remove the stress, anger, negative thoughts, and the distractions that generally undermine our lives. It is a way to calm ourselves so that we, you,  can turn dreams into ideas and ideas into actions, free from the delusions that all too often undermine the higher purpose to which we are trying to arrive.

I recently told a student of mine, do not create issues that do not exist in your life just so that you can be the one to solve them. There are more than enough issues out there for you to focus on. Just open your eyes and ears. Contemplate those issues and develop a resolution based on your observations.

If you jump too quickly into solutions, you will resolve the delusions that you have created, but not the underlying problem. In time the core problem will resurface. You will once again scratch your head, state how similar your current issue is to the one you had a week, a month, or a year ago as you once again try to resolve the problem that has surfaced without looking any deeper.

When a thought interrupts your meditation, do not simply ignore it. Take a breath, examine it. Hold it in your hands and contemplate it as you turn it so that you can see it from a different perspective. Ask yourself if it is a thought that is worth further examination, or one you should simply release back into the ether.

Use this same approach for all issues you come upon in the “real world”. Do not jump to the solution too quickly before you have spent time examining the issue. Take time to explore whatever obstacle lies in front of you.

Take a breath to look at it from a new perspective. Some obstacles you see may not even be relevant, they are things you can avoid by simply adjusting your direction until you have passed it. Do you really have to bump into that person walking toward you on the sidewalk, or can you simply drop your shoulder to miss them altogether? Do you really have to wait for that car to drift into your lane? Or can you be fully present when you drive and slow down, to avoid them with little or no interruption in your journey. In some instances you may need to stop or step off your path, but is that really all that bad? Considering all the regret in your life, will that really make a difference in the future?

There are many ways to avoid an obstacle without confronting it. Simply give yourself enough time to plan an appropriate response and you will be surprised by how many seemingly insurmountable issues fade away before you even arrive at them. This is how to take a meditative approach to your life, without changing your life.

I know many meditation “masters” say to remain in the here and now if you want your life to be a happy one. But there is something far better in looking ahead, perhaps spending 80% of your time in the here and now while spending the other 20% looking just far enough ahead so to see the obstacles that may block your path, or if there is even a path to continue on.

This is the difference between living a meditative life in the here and now, in the 21st Century world we live in rather than meditation as it was created for the world as it was 2,500 years ago.

Be aware, and your life will unfold before you as it is supposed to.

I hope this helps.

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Parallel Paths of Dharma

When you find yourself at an impossible fork in the road where every option seems to be less than ideal, take a break and let the Dharma decide.

You can exchange that word for fate, the winds of time, or destiny, but sometimes the best decision in life is to do nothing and let the decision take care of itself. Yes, you lose what little control you think you have in the process, but you will find that making no decision is often the best way out. It takes your ego out of the process and opens up new opportunities you may have overlooked. What you may even find is that the world moves no matter how hard you fight it. That no matter how badly you want to swim upstream at some point fighting the current will just leave you exhausted and unable to make a clear decision when the critical time to do so arrives.

If the world is falling into a recession, now may not be the time to start a business. If the love of your life has their eyes elsewhere, then pursuing that person may not be the smartest use of your time and energy no matter how badly you want to do so right now. There is often little you can do about the way the world works. But there is a lot you can do about where and when you spend your energy.

Instead of forcing a decision, and then having to work twice as hard to reverse it, sometimes it is better to wait. If a storm is coming, save your energies for when it hits. Do not be afraid to push whatever venture you want to work on to the back burner until the world is ready for you. Now may be the time to narrow your choices down to a few options, and to follow both of those options until they diverge. In time they will. In the meantime be mindful of each. When they move far enough apart go with the option that clearly stands out. Do not worry, one will.

There is an inevitability in this approach that is as old as time itself. One reason you may be having a problem making a decision is that in the end both paths lead to the same outcome. It may be that your intuition is telling you now is not the time to move forward. It may even be telling you that you do not have enough information or skill to proceed.

Listen to it. In time you will learn more about whatever it is you are doing. The winds of the world may shift. New opportunities may open up. The subtle patterns may not be apparent to you, only becoming clearer as you grow more comfortable with your surroundings and yourself. Often the reason you are having such a tough time making a decision is that you are trying to draw a decision out of a non-existent issue, and that is always a mistake. Forcing a decision will inevitably lead you down the wrong path, or cause you to waste so much time and energy that you will be depleted by the time your decision matures.

Instead, let go of your ego and your need to “control” your destiny. Narrow your choices down to two or three that will keep you heading in the right general direction, then follow both paths until they diverge. Be mindful of how alike and unalike they are. Gather your facts along the way. Experience the differences.

In time you will find yourself at a point when the right path becomes so apparent you will wonder why you never saw it in the first place. You will understand. You will also realize that either path will have led you to that point, only now you will be prepared to make the right decision no matter which way you go. Having walked both paths you will gain wisdom and a clearer vision of what you are really walking into.

It may seem counter-intuitive, but by giving yourself up to the Dharma and by taking your time you will be surprised at how well it will guide you toward the right choice. Slow down and breathe. Let go of your ego. Let the Dharma drive for a bit as you take a meditative approach to the big decisions in your life and enjoy the view along the way.

Oh, and if you feel pushed by someone who says “we need a decision right now,” let them make the decision as you let the Dharma make the one that cleans up their mess. Never feel as if you must rush. In today’s world there is always time to make the right decision and less need to listen to let that fight or flight voice ring in your ears.

Following parallel paths as the Dharma works itself out may mean working double-time for a bit, but for the important decisions in your life, that may not be a bad thing. Especially if your fear of making the wrong decision is an issue.

Be well and I hope this helps.

Jeff

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Pick Yourself Up

There will always be days, weeks, even months when you feel as if the delusions of your life are overrunning your life. It’s okay, we all get them. It’s just a signal that it is time to wake up to the real world, not the one you think you are living in, but to the real world that is all around you. It may feel like you need a shot of caffeine or a cocktail, but it’s not. You just need a bit of sleep, some healthy food, to slow down and to reach out to your community of friends and family. More than likely you are simply feeling tired of living your life in delusion. Stop thinking in terms of success and failure, winning or losing, think in terms of delusions.

I know it is not easy, but these tips will help get you back on your path to stop tripping over your own nature, to truly Awaken to your own Simple Truth.

Here are a few ways to get you back on your path and keep you moving in the right direction. After all, it is your life and now is the time to live it your way with a meditative twist:

  1. Ask yourself when was the last time you got 8 hours of sleep? When was the last time you sat down to a healthy meal? When was the last time you sat down with a friend and listened, really listened to them? What you hear may surprise you. If you do not take care of yourself nobody else will. Remember what the airline steward , and you need to take care of yourself or you will fall apart. So get some sleep, eat a healthy meal, talk to a friend and then see how you feel.
  2. Take a deep breath, roll your shoulders back, and smile. Every time you inhale feel the relaxing strength of each breath flow from the top of your head to the tips of your fingers and toes. Begin with your scalp, feel each breath flow down from your scalp to your eyebrows, your eyes, your cheeks, your lips and your jaw. Feel your tongue drop from the roof of your mouth, relaxing you as it passes down your neck, your shoulders, your arms and your fingers. Feel each breath flow down to your hips, your legs and your toes. Relax and feel the ebb and flow of that energy as it flows through you, lifting you, giving you the Focused Calm to move forward.
  3. Reach out and help someone. It does not have to be earth shattering. It can just be a smile, holding the door for someone, being fully present as you listen to them without judgment. Make someone else feel good about themselves without seeking anything in return. Then smile to yourself for doing so.
  4. Touch the earth. Even if that is the side of a building or the pavement, a sidewalk or an office floor. Remind yourself that you are connected to the earth in some way. Tune yourself in to that connection and smile as you follow that connection no matter how thin it may be. Remember electricity travels though the thinnest wire to illuminate a lamp from the tiniest of batteries. Do the same as you touch the earth to re-energize.
  5. Write down five things that you are proud of. Put that list in your pocket or handbag. Remind yourself that you have done great things in your life and will do many more in the future.
  6. Acknowledge what is happening in your life. Label the moments where you think things went wrong and acknowledge them. Let your brain know that those are just moment in your life and that everything will be okay.
  7. Stop picking up your mobile phone, stay off of social media [Facebook, Twitter, Instagram]. Pick up a book, sit back, and read instead.
  8. Stop comparing yourself to others. You are not someone else, they are not you. Just know that they are just as insecure as you are. Now, laugh at yourself for being foolish and only seeing the curated life they want you to see.
  9. Stop watching the news. Today’s news is pretty much a rehash of yesterday’s events. It does not change from day-to-day. So take a break and enjoy life instead. CNN will not mind, it will not even know, but you will.
  10. Train yourself to quit the negative and focus on the positive. Start today. Know that we are programmed to see the rain more than the sun. It is human nature from the time when we were hunter-gatherers, but it does not have to be your nature today.

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Be well,

 

 

Jeff

 

Slow Down – Do More

To some people life is all about faster, quicker, sooner. Faster downloads, quicker processing, and sooner, same-day delivery. For those that think they are not performing fast enough, or falling behind in their studies, there’s always Adderall.

For some reason we think by running, running, running we will get more done. The problem is the faster you run, the more details you miss, and that is how you fall behind. It is those details that catch you in the end. Sooner or later you will have to go back and edit whatever it is you are doing. After all it is in those details that you truly live.

It is far better to attend to the details of your life the first time around than having to go back and edit them later. So why not slow down and enjoy the process the first time around? Why not pay attention to the details of your life so that you do not have to spend time re-aligning yourself with the work at hand and the inevitable edit that comes after?

In the end, slowing down and paying attention to the details of your life will save you hours and years in the end.

When you first pass by a painting or a photograph, you may think “Oh, that’s a pretty painting”, or “that’s a stunning photograph.” But it is not until you take a closer look that you notice the details. Those are what turn an artist’s perspective into a thing of beauty. How is it framed, how are the light and shadows dealt with? The subtle nuances are what make the difference.

As Mies Van De Rohe said, “God lives in the details.” Apparently so does the Devil – depending on your perspective. It is in the details that you can lose yourself and burn a lifetime or find yourself and turn an average life into a thing of beauty.

How many times have you passed a view completely unaware that it was there? How many times have you read a book, completely forgetting the words just pages before, or turned a project in with typos and misspellings? It takes a special person to slow down and see the world for what it is. It takes someone who is truly awake and present to notice something that others never see.

Why not take the time to notice the details on your first pass? Those details are what hold the scents hidden behind a photographer’s image, the tastes beneath a painter’s brush, or the essence of a band. Those same details will bring joy into your life and make your days, work or play, worth living.

Learn to slow down and notice the details. It will save you a lot of time in the end. It will also bring your life to life in a more vibrant way. Slow down, be aware of the world around you and find a balance between noticing the details without losing yourself to them. That is what will make the difference in everything you do.

You can lose yourself in the details, which is how they become the Devil, or you can use them to bring out the beauty of a project, no matter what it is. The choice is yours.

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Enjoy

 

 

 

j.

 

 

Choose To Be Mindful

Being mindful is not an endeavor confined to a specific time or space. It is a practice that should be woven into every action you take and every reaction you make. Mindfulness is a choice. It is an orientation in the world that you choose to make or to avoid in your everyday acts. When practiced on a consistent basis being mindful will form the foundation upon which you build the habits that will lead you or from unconscious auto-responses to conscious acts, and over time toward enlightenment.

Simply drawing a breath, down deep into your lungs, slowly and fully, is a choice you make. It is no different than slowing down at a meal and chewing each bite mindfully. Each can be supportive for yourself and for the betterment of the world if done with Love. The difference? That you choose to take your breath or chew your food in a mindful manner. The alternative? To simply fill your lungs or gulp your meals down automatically and live life as you always have.

The same can be said for all of your habits. Eating, if done mindfully, will enhance your life one mindful bite at a time – they will nourish your mind, body and spirit with the Love of the Universe.

Even eliminating waste from your body can be a mindful act. No longer an act of revulsion, but a thing to be embraced as a natural part of the digestive cycle. The same can be said of intimacy and even of dying. Each, if approached as a mindful act, can be an act of Love. The passing of the spirit to wherever your belief system leads it, will become an act of Love and light, rather than of mourning.

To make any moment a mindful moment, simply apply your breath to your actions and smile as you choose where you want your life to go.

It really is that simple.

The first step to making an action a mindful action is to consciously choose to do so.

Studies show that roughly 40 percent of your activities are performed out of habit. These habits emerge through what is known as associative learning. That is, “X” happens, and in response, you do “Y”, “X” happens, you do “Y”, “X” happens, and you do “Y”.

You are programmed to repeat what works until behavioral patters emerge. It is a survival instinct that almost every animal follows. After all, if it worked yesterday and I survived, I simply have to do the same thing and I will, once again, survive.

That kind of mechanism worked wonderfully for hundreds of thousands of years, but in today’s world those same life-saving habits will wear you down. The subtle nuances of something as simple as a random social situation creates the stress and anxiety that you find yourself feeling – and this is not a good thing. It may support the growth of a stable society, but it does so at the cost of you, the individual.

That is because you will eventually feel as if you are failing because you will find yourself falling far short of your potential. A classic example of this involves the Take 5 program that was started years ago.

The “Take 5” program simply stated that we should all have 5 servings of fruits and vegetables every day. When the “Take 5” media campaign was rolled out 35 percent of people polled came away believing they should eat 5 fruits and vegetables a day. It was deemed a success.

However, when looking at what people actually ate, only 11 percent of people actually met this goal. It made people feel inadequate and stressed that they were not eating as healthily as they should. The Take 5 program changed people’s intentions, but failed to change their habits.

So what is one thing you can do to change your habits? Take ownership of your actions.

When you open a door, say “I CHOOSE to open this door.”

When you go shopping for dinner or order from a menu, say to yourself “I CHOOSE to buy something healthy.”

Be mindful of your options, be mindful of your decision, and then OWN IT.

Oh yes, and then reinforce your decision to be mindful. Lock it in place. Congratulate yourself, embrace yourself, smile to yourself for making the right decision.

Now, Go and Do Good. And, Smile With Love in Your Heart As You Do.

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Most important – Love yourself and be well,

Labor Day Meditation

Happy Labor Day.

Just remember this is more than a day to celebrate the end of summer. It is more than a day to celebrate the workers of the world, or to buy a new car. It is a day to reflect and renew your commitment to the self-labor you require, because when September rolls around it will all get a lot more complicated.

With the elections in the U.S. and everything else going on in the world, it is, as they say, ABOUT TO GET REAL.

So this Labor Day, let go. And when I say let go, I mean truly LET GO.

No that does not mean losing yourself in whatever drugs or alcohol they’re using at whatever party you crashed. I mean leave all the angst and anxiety of the summer behind.

Do you still hate you’re the way you look after seeing yourself in a bathing suit all summer? Let It Go. Everybody wonders about the way they look, but you can change it.

Do you still think you’re on the edge of losing your relationship? Let It Go – Everybody thinks they’re on the verge of a breakup, all the time, but you can change it.

Do you think the direction you are heading is not where you want to go? Let It Go – everybody wonders if they are going in the right direction, but you can change it

Labor Day was created “to pay tribute to the American workers for all of their contributions and achievements.” It was created by the labor movement at the end of the 19th century and became a federal holiday in 1894. The world was a very different place back then. So were you.

At some point, Labor Day became the day that marked the end of summer, the last day you could wear summer whites, and the day you could pick up a great deal on mattresses, appliances, and that car you’ve had your eye on. And that is where the similarity to some kind of “labor appreciation” ends.

So why not use it as a day to let go of the insecurities you built up for yourself and to start your life anew? There will always be goals you want to reach and ambitions you want to accomplish. There are the things that will make you happy and things that do not, so why deny them? Just make sure they are your things, not the result of some guilt trip social media has put you on.

If you feel your anxiety building because summer is drawing to a close, simply stop, breathe, and smile to yourself as you contemplate where that anxiousness comes from. Was it driven from within? Or was it driven from without?

If you want to make more money in a career you love so you can move your family to whatever your idea of a sanctuary is, then that is a good thing. It you want to make more money in a career that is laden with stress and anxiety simply so that you can brag to your friends about the size of your office or your title – then it may be time to rethink your priorities. If you want to trim down to create a healthier you, then that is a good thing. If you want to diet so you can look good in that sexy outfit you saw in a window – then it may be time to rethink your priorities.

If you are in doubt about whether what you want is actually what you want, simply step back from it all. Take a break. Take a few slow and deep breaths. You can even meditate to re-center yourself in the here and now. Once the swirl in your head has stopped and you have settled, ask yourself where is this coming from?

If that is too difficult to tell, then step forward and ask yourself where this need taking you?

If your desire to lose or gain weight is nestled in your need to show off your body or to fit into someone else’s idea of what is attractive, then it probably comes from the wrong place. If it is driven by the desire to show someone up, or to fit into some social norm, then it is probably sending you in the wrong direction.

However, if your desire is the byproduct of wanting be healthier, then it is probably coming from a good place. If you want to swim faster or hike further than you did before, then it is probably sending you in the right direction.

Labor Day should be reserved for this sort of self-examination. Not in a bitter or cruel way, but in a healthy manner. An ebb and flow that gently swings from meditation and mindful breathing to a gentle self examination.

When you feel your thoughts begin to drift from a place of Loving Kindness to a place of bitterness and anger, it is time to take a break, to breathe and meditate until you have brought yourself back to your center.

In any type of contemplation there is a rhythm, a healthy back and forth, that pendulums you to and from your center. Let go and allow yourself to follow this pattern. Embrace it with a knowing smile as you watch your mind distract itself in fits and starts, before finding your balance and your center. See yourself in a warm place of calm before beginning again.

Let this be your Labor Day be a new beginning as you say goodbye to summer and hello to Fall.

If you want to receive gentle reminders like this every week, simply click on the Waking Buddha Breath form at the upper-right corner of this page. We can add you to our list and send you a gift to settle your day before it even starts.

More important – remember to Love yourself as you smile, and be well,

 

 

Jeff

Meditation – Nobody is Better Than You

YOU are on your own journey. Even if you find the love of your life, the path you are on is only wide enough for one person. From time to time you may walk beside someone else, at other times you will struggle with yourself.

That voice of self-doubt and that feeling of insecurity? They are not real. They are the result of comparing the behind-the-scenes reality of your life with the highly edited film that everyone else has produced of the life they want you to see.

The simple truth is they have just as many fears, worries and concerns as you do. They look at themselves and see a train wreck unfolding, just like you, instead of the brilliant bit of editing that you see of them.

Just remember, you are on your own path. Forget about what everyone else is doing and seemingly achieving. They look at you and think the same thing that you think of them. Perhaps they wish they had different elements of your life like than you wish you had of theirs, but it is all the same in the end.

Take a moment to think about it. Do you wish you had their mortgage? Their failing relationship? Their screaming kids? Do you really want their medications?

I didn’t think so.

I know you wish you had the glamour they are trying so hard to project. You wish you had their big house and fancy car. You wish you had their closet of designer clothes and their bank account. Well, they wish they had your freedom. They wish they had the life that you take for granted as well.

So start living your life, but live it YOUR way.

Forget about what everyone is doing. YOUR life is about finding your limits and then breaking through them.

Find out what it is you want to do and then go after it. Take it step by step and do not stop for anything.

  • If it’s taking longer than you think it should. Do not stop. It always does.
  • If it is harder than you thought it would be. Do not stop. It always is.
  • If you are overcome with doubt. Do not stop. Overcoming doubt is what this is all about.

If you do not understand it yet. All of this is just an illusion. Your real life is lived in the here and now. The real challenges you face are not in the world around you, but in your mind.

Don’t believe it? All you have to do is think back to when you were most satisfied with who you are. It always occurred when you overcame a personal hurdle, didn’t it?

Not somebody else’s, but your own. Yes I thought so.

So find another hurdle for yourself, one that only matters only to you and then jump over it.

That is what real gold medalists do.